I’ve been jotting down potential post ‘titles’ the last few weeks and now that I’ve accumulated several, it only makes sense to post something. The only problem with that…is the fact that I can’t “actually” remember my train of thought behind the titles. And since I’m procrastinating right now (I’m supposed to be writing a paper), I think I have enough time to try and decipher what this particular title means. Okay, so here goes.
It has certainly been a hectic few months, and I don’t think that’ll stop any time soon, but I’m used to it now so I suppose it’s not so bad. (I’m trying desperately to remember…) If you know me at all, you’ll know that I OFTEN say a lot of stupid things…none of which I tend to remember very well afterwards. And if you know me VERY well, you’ll know that there certain times when these stupid things becomes ‘monologues’. Witnessed many a time on this blog (long, long, long posts!). Those are sort of like my ‘drunken monologues’, however the ones in person are genuinely cringe worthy. Why doesn’t anyone stop me?! (In all fairness, you can try and stop me and I’ll just end up doing it anyway) And for some reason, a certain someone has always been at the receiving end of my drunken monologues…I think he’s now acquainted with this past time of mine, and lucky for me he tends not to make me feel like the complete idiot that I have been, which is useful because I usually forget what I say! Some people might call a ‘drunken monologue’ just another rant, but it most certainly is far from it. The makings of a ‘drunken monologue’ consist of the following: (a) there needs to be an ’emotional charge’ (see below for definition) involved, (b) the recipient is often the centre of the charge…but not always, (c) there are no actual pauses during the monologue, unless for emphasis and plenty of self questioning (think Macbeth), (d) speech is slightly slurred, or there any ‘plenty’ of missing words and lastly, (e) the slurring ‘mock-drunkard’ usually remembers nothing afterwards, despite not actually being drunk. Very different to a rant.
I think ’emotional charges’ are pretty self explanatory, but for those of you who are feeling particularly sleepy (a bit like myself today), I’ll explain anyway. When you hear the word ’emotional’, you think weepy, sappy and perhaps a little depressed. My definition of emotional is a lot more rounded, certainly in this context. ‘Emotional charges’ range from feeling particularly pathetic and lethargic, wanting to throw a couple of glass beakers at the wall, ferociously cleaning the entire lab/house, to anything that makes you smile…or in my case, squeal! (Minions!) A very eclectic range of emotions all covered. Whilst it is necessary for a ‘drunken monologue’ to have an ’emotional charge’, this is not a reciprocal relation. ‘Emotional charges’ don’t need to manifest to monologue stage, they can usually get quashed quite easily and so something as simple as rearranging the contents of a cupboard can provide satisfaction and prove a worthy distraction (my favourite word!).
Okay, I have no idea what the ‘other fun facts’ are. And sensing the sarcasm behind it, I’ll spare you the details.